


Voice

by pigfartsstudent (LoopyLiesey)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-28
Updated: 2014-08-28
Packaged: 2018-02-15 03:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2213688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoopyLiesey/pseuds/pigfartsstudent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus Lupin, Halloween 1982.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Voice

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Polski available: [Głos](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2279796) by [euphoria814](https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphoria814/pseuds/euphoria814)



> So this fic is angsty and hurts and is miserable, as it would after on Halloween 1982 for Remus.

“Bastard.”

The single word left Remus Lupin’s lips, as he sat at the kitchen table, a bottle of Firewhiskey in his left hand. In front of him on the table lay the days newspapers, the front page reading ‘ _One Year On: What Happened To You-Know-Who?_ ’ Three quarters of the page was dedicated to Voldemort’s rise and fall, the other quarter to James, Lily, and Harry Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew.

“Why did you do it?”

Remus wasn’t going to get an answer. He never was.

Remus was alone. James and Lily and Peter were dead, _he_  was in Azkaban. It was all  _his_  fault.

 _“I can’t believe you fell for it.”_ It was  _his_ voice, mocking Remus. Remus lifted the bottle of Firewhiskey to his lips, taking a sip. Then another. Another.

_“You disgusted me, every time we were together. Disgusting creature. Monster.”_

Remus stood up and started pacing, bottle still in hand.

_“It was all an act, and you believed it! I hated you, and you thought I loved you!”_

“Stop,” Remus pleaded quietly.

_“As for James and Lily – disgusting. I knew Potter was a blood traitor, but marrying a Mudblood? I was so pleased to give them away.”_

“Stop!” Remus yelled, tears running down his face.

 _“Oh, and Pettigrew. Pathetic Pettigrew. There was no way he could beat me, and yet he still tried. Dead now. They’re all dead,” His_ voice sounded delighted,  _“You’re all alone now, Remus.”_

“DON’T!” Remus screamed, thowing down the bottle which smashed, the Firewhiskey spilling over the floor. Ignoring it, Remus dropped to his knees, sobbing.

_“The monster is all alone. All his friends are dead.”_

“I hate you.”

_“The hate of a werewolf. How quaint.”_

“I love you.” They were words that Remus could barely admit to himself, and yet they came pouring out his mouth. It hurt how true they were. He still loved  _him_. He loved a murderer, a traitor. That made Remus a monster more than the full moon ever could.

_“Pathetic. You still **love**  me? Even knowing I  **never**  loved you?”_

Pathetic. That’s me,” Remus murmured.

_“It was an act! Don’t you understand that? An act!”_

Remus hated listening to  _his_  voice, but it was still somehow comforting.

“ _I should have killed you too.”_

“Why didn’t you?” Remus exclaimed, “It would be easier than this. Why didn’t you?’

But the voice was silent, and Remus was more lonely than before. 


End file.
